Missing for 48 days. Brian was taken when he was four years old and was missing for 48 days. Brian is now five years old and this traumatic time in all our lives is slowly, slowly healing, although it will never entirely be forgotten. Brian is a very smart, sufficient child and is dealing very well with past events. Yet, in this common everyday life of NOW the past suddenly explodes into terror for this small child. Just recently while shopping he lost visual sight of his mom. Instead of looking quickly around and taking a few steps forward he froze and started screaming at the top of his lungs. Just a few seconds out of sight of his mother sent him into the depths of terror.

"Where is Brian?" is the story of how a child can be "taken" by a parent and "hidden" from the other parent for 48 days. This is the record of our thoughts, feelings and actions during these 48 days and beyond. Please keep in mind that this is OUR story and as such is colored by our feelings and thoughts. Time has eased some of the hurt and fears and we can look back a bit more objectively and perhaps understand the actions of others with a bit more kindness. I have always been able to "walk in another's shoes" and to realize that if I were in another's place I would probably do just as they would do, given their circumstances and events, but .... as hard as I have tried, I cannot even to this day, understand why a child was kept totally away from his mother for 48 days. Come. Walk a bit in our shoes. Walk a bit in Brian's shoes.

Brian likes to come visit Grandma's house. Within 15 minutes of the time he gets here, he has my mouse, my computer and my games. I am lucky. He lets me play with his Matchbox trucks and race cars!

Korey is eight years old now. He is very bright, self-sufficient and one neat child. (I am certain these grandchildren get their intelligence and good looks from this grandmother!

ilence is olden

Does it seem that the only peace and quiet you have is when you lock yourself in the bathroom for a few moments? Thinking of running away from home and living by yourself in a cave and just soaking in the gorgeous and golden silence, listening to the soft trills of bird calls and the sound of a musical bubbling, babbling brook? Well, don't worry. There will be a time for silence.

Enjoy your children while they are young. They grow up so FAST. It seems like you turn around once and they are in college! Take some time each week to make memories! Making memories doesn't have to be a trip to Disney Land. Memories can consist of building a boat dock in the back yard (Yes, in the mud!) for his toy boats, or taking a nature walk through the neighborhood collecting interesting rocks, twigs, and leaves. Make some memories now before they get into college.

When my daughter married and moved away from home I discovered among her many boxes of books, school papers and small treasures she collected and saved over the years several recorded tapes from her early grade school years. She had borrowed my tape recorder and recorded her make believe school. What a treasure of memories. I can listen to my daughter "teaching" her make believe students how to play the flute. (She had just started lessons in the third grade.) One of the tapes has my daughter and her cousins telling jokes to each other and then cracking up with laughter. (Do you remember the old "knock-knock" jokes? I do .... now!)

So give your children a tape recorder and tapes and leave them alone to play. Replace the tapes every so often and store the used tapes somewhere safe. About 15 or 20 years from now you will have a treasure beyond price!

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